Home

When the sun sets behind the mountains,

or the rain flows like water from a fountain,

home is where my heart is.



Home, a little white church.

Home, a blue bird sitting on a perch.

Home, something bigger than all.

Home, where my heart sits so tall.



The sun can rise, and light the skies,

and not touch my eyes,

But I'd stay here on this side,

because home is always on my mind.



Home, is the smiling face,

of those whose handprints I can trace.

Home, is the mending of my heart,

when my world has torn it all apart.



Home is above,

with the doves.

Flying higher than any man has seen,

that home is not my inbetween.



Here I am waiting for the true home,

here I am and I know I'm never alone.

Here, I am sitting, living my life,

here, I am waiting, for the day with no more strife.



Home, is where my heart is.

To you, from me.

Some days are still harder than others.
Some days, I still miss you.

Some days I can listen to our song over and over,
and not be affected.
Other days, it makes me want to cry.

Cry for everything that was lost.
Cry because we took a chance but it took us too far.

I understand now, that what we did, can't be undone.
I understand now, that I truly was the only one.

Some days, the tears are barricaded back by my strength.
Most days, They're barricaded back simply by me.

I never cried over you.
My heart did.
I didn't.

I think somewhere inside of it all, God was calming me.
Whispering to me that it was going to be okay.
And so, it was.
It was okay.

I think of you, and smile.
It doesn't matter that it's been a while,
since the last time YOU made me smile.

We haven't talked,
we haven't laughed,
we haven't started up that "friendship" you so desperately wanted us to have.

Yes, I'm hurt.

But I don't hurt everyday.
In fact, I don't hurt MOST days.
I only hurt sometimes.

Do you?
Do you hurt?
is THAT why we can't talk?

....or are you still running away?


All I ever wanted was for you, and I, to
Love, I guess. Learn about
Everything we possibly good...but the
Xcitement got the best of us.

I miss you.
I truly, truly, honestly do.
And a huge part of me hopes and wishes that you miss me too.
Do you??
I'll never ask.

The Wagon

The wagon is empty.
Where have you gone?
The wagon is empty.
But I'm still holding on.

Mother and sister,
wait at the house.
While my heart blisters,
as I stand still like a mouse.

The flowers have grown,
so beautiful and tall.
Your coldness was as stone,
when you walked past the wall.

The wagon is empty,
and where did you go?
The wagon, is empty.
I wish it wasn't so.

The house still stands there,
and your spirit is still around.
You'll always be welcome here,
Though you left, without a sound.

I stand in the midst,
of where we spent time.
How could you leave me like this?
Your problem was mine.

The wagon is empty,
Where have you gone?
The wagon is empty...
But I'm still holding on.

A note

I got a note today,
it was left by a long lost friend.
And as I tried to grab it,
it grew legs and ran.

I chased it, and I chased it,
all around the town.
I ran and ran and ran,
but could never pin it down.

As I ran, I noticed how,
my life seemed to be on screens.
Left and right, black and white.
With nothing in between.

I saw me a year from now,
graduating from high school.
I saw what I would be like,
it was like looking into a dream pool.

I saw my future husband,
and I saw our future kids.
I saw me looking back,
not regretting things I did.

I saw me in Church,
and quite often, it seemed,
I saw myself smiling,
at the fact that I'm redeemed.

I stopped to look at one picture,
the biggest one of all.
It was me, and my family,
grown so big, rather than small.

I had to catch my breath,
for I saw everything I had dreamed.
The family I had wanted,
and everyone was happy, their faces beamed.

Then, I remembered how I came,
to this picture in my mind,
and I kept on chasing that note,
until, finally, I got it in a bind.

I opened it slowly,
for I knew not what was inside.
It simply said, "You're welcome."
And the tears filled my eyes.

You're always in my heart.

I'm kinda in the mood for mkaing myself miss you.
The mood for listening to all of our old songs, and singing along, just like the way I hope you do.
Call it loneliness,
shoot,
It's probably the most obvious.
But, I honestly don't know what to do,
to make myself stop missing you.

I could never tell you how much it hurt,
to be thought a diamond, then left in the dirt.
I could never express the way I feel,
to find out that what was fake, wasn't real.
Like the way I thought it was.

To say I miss you, is an understatement.
To say I crave you is a dreaded realization.
I don't love you, but I thought I did.
You, are a simple, little, just another kid.

But everytime it comes back,
I find myself thinking it's you I lack.
Everytime I cry inside,
I think, you could make it die.

You could stop the pain,
and you could stop the rain.
You could make me feel loved,
you could change this pigeon into a dove.

I'm kinda in the mood for making myself miss you.
The mood for listening to all of our old songs, and singing along, just like the way I hope you do.
Call it loneliness,
shoot,
it's probably the most obvious.

It's late at night,
and I am in fright.
That I will never find another you.
Oh, but I hope that's not true.

I hope, if you are not my one,
the one that is, reminds me of someone..
someone that is you, or terribly close.
Someone who never meant to be an overdose.

I will not say your name, that will make it worse.
I kinda wish I could send your memory off in a hearse.
But I would want you back, and quite soon,
I'd be thinking of you while looking at the moon.

In light of my mood, I turned on our song.
And despite myself, I sang along.
Then, somehow, deep inside, I knew,
you were singing along too.

Untitled..

Have you ever felt alone,
in a crowded room?
Ever known you were secure,
but still feared your doom?

Have you ever walked about,
at night when it's pitch black?
And thought to yourself,
what if I'm never coming back?

Have you ever looked at someone,
and thought of how much you loved them?
Then thought to yourself right after,
"I'm never going to be good enough for them."

Have you ever contemplated death?
When your world stops spinning and you're all alone?
But after that,
have you ever contemplated life?
Ever realized there's someone greater watching over you from His throne?

But maybe it's just too simple,
to have faith and to hope.
Have you ever thought that life's too simple,
to need to be ended by a rope?

I never wanted to leave you behind,
but it's time I live my own life.
I never wanted to leave your mind,
but all I was doing was causing you strife.

Have you ever thought about today,
the same way you'd think about tomorrow?
Not here yet, and maybe going away,
nothing from it for you to steal or borrow?

I've never sat alone,
and I've never cried.
I've never lost sight of the one on His thrown,
I've never wanted to die.

But that's all a lie,
can't you see?
Because we all see the sky,
and we all see the trees.

We're all one and yet another,
if you've ever known.
We're apart and yet together,
similiar, and unknown.

Have you ever felt alone,
in a crowded room?
Ever felt secure,
and still feared your doom?